tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post8341275440178691564..comments2023-10-31T05:03:38.910-07:00Comments on Letters from a broad...: Porn and MeC. L. Hansonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12698855413639518095noreply@blogger.comBlogger46125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-53194642963544892022011-07-07T05:28:48.746-07:002011-07-07T05:28:48.746-07:00Hey Paul!!!
Yeah, that's also why I added a s...Hey Paul!!!<br /><br />Yeah, that's also why I added a sidebar widget that randomly selects old posts -- I hope people occasionally look at it and see an interesting old post they might have missed. :DC. L. Hansonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12698855413639518095noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-21287610001124620112011-07-03T10:18:47.560-07:002011-07-03T10:18:47.560-07:00That should have read, "So I clicked through,...That should have read, "So I clicked through, thinking it was a new post of yours."Paul Sunstonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02462598852553696040noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-28601600830226551382011-07-03T10:17:03.304-07:002011-07-03T10:17:03.304-07:00OK, it's been years since you posted this. Bu...OK, it's been years since you posted this. But a link to it somehow appeared on my blog stats page today. So I clicked through, it was a new post of yours.<br /><br />At any rate, I read your post, Chanson, and it is excellent. I wish that in blogging old posts like this one didn't just end up neglected, because they deserve to be read and re-read.<br /><br />As for feminists and porn: I never have figured that one out. Perhaps it's just a manifestation of the tendencies the genders have of trying to meddle in each other's sexuality. I mean, men are always trying to remake women's sexuality in the image of their own, and women are always trying to remake men's sexuality in their own image to. So maybe that's what it's about. But I wouldn't know.Paul Sunstonehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02462598852553696040noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-50002021380497144962008-02-16T00:26:00.000-08:002008-02-16T00:26:00.000-08:00Thanks Rschauer!!!Regarding memes in marriage, are...Thanks Rschauer!!!<BR/><BR/>Regarding memes in marriage, are you saying you think marriage and marriage expectations should be defined differently? I've written a little about how marriage is evolving <A RHEF="http://lfab-uvm.blogspot.com/2007/01/discrimination-against-homosexuals-why.html">here</A> and <A HREF="http://lfab-uvm.blogspot.com/2006/03/virginity-once-asset-now-liability.html" REL="nofollow">here</A>.C. L. Hansonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12698855413639518095noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-35837356186064420162008-02-15T18:25:00.000-08:002008-02-15T18:25:00.000-08:00C.L. happened to stumble in here from a post on ht...C.L. happened to stumble in here from a post on http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/<BR/>and I've given you a bookmark. Sheesh, what a thought provoking site! <BR/><BR/>And this thread on porn...I have to say it's so necessary since the memes we've (at least I've) been raised under were so wrong and false that at least you have the gumption to get the conversation "on track" that I feel the well worn phrase: you go girl!...is well earned. <BR/><BR/>Before I ask a pressing question I'd like to raise the issue of marriage...and all that that means in the xtian, muslim, mormon worlds and to simply say if porn is so bad...what about the memes in marriage? I'd also like to ask...so where does this leave us?rschauerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03249662847499387858noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-475622802013716372007-12-21T08:32:00.000-08:002007-12-21T08:32:00.000-08:00Hey John!!!Great article!!! I love the line "The ...Hey John!!!<BR/><BR/>Great article!!! I love the line "The unfashionable truth is that I have mostly embraced pornography on principle rather than as a personal practice." That's me to a T. She's right that it's weird that the stuff is so repetitive, given how much of it there is -- normally the "long tail" produces more interesting choices. Hopefully her plea for better porn will succeed. :DC. L. Hansonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12698855413639518095noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-25370096282398452682007-12-21T07:55:00.000-08:002007-12-21T07:55:00.000-08:00Here's an article from a feminist looking for "wom...Here's <A HREF="http://www.alternet.org/story/15042/" REL="nofollow">an article</A> from a feminist looking for "woman-friendly porn." It speaks to the struggle that many women (and men!) have to find porn that is not formulaic (and actually interesting). <BR/><BR/>The market creation idea is intriguing, but we're not ready to add film-making to our already overwhelming distractions. :P The problem is that there is a market for quality erotic film that includes women in its target audience (Zalman King has tapped into this), but I think it's viewed as high-risk. It's easier for producers to churn out what they know will sell.vdJohnRhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01822899155130408891noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-86070700297572586962007-12-20T23:07:00.000-08:002007-12-20T23:07:00.000-08:00Hey Bull!!!That's encouraging news!!!I've always f...Hey Bull!!!<BR/><BR/>That's encouraging news!!!<BR/><BR/>I've always felt that -- for those who think porn gives negative messages about women -- the best solution is to take the initiative and create the type of erotic images that you like (and create a market for them) rather than standing on the sidelines decrying all porn.C. L. Hansonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12698855413639518095noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-68012825968266394672007-12-20T15:39:00.000-08:002007-12-20T15:39:00.000-08:00Any time I've gone to an adult store at least 1/4 ...Any time I've gone to an adult store at least 1/4 of the patrons have been female. It's obviously not just guys that are into it even though it mostly seems aimed at them.Bullhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01343937101221163598noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-60201922345981427662007-11-30T04:13:00.000-08:002007-11-30T04:13:00.000-08:00Hey PornStudent!!!They're not as rare as you may i...Hey PornStudent!!!<BR/><BR/>They're not as rare as you may imagine...C. L. Hansonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12698855413639518095noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-57540366333119671222007-11-30T04:11:00.000-08:002007-11-30T04:11:00.000-08:00It's a pleasure to read a feminist who isn't oppos...It's a pleasure to read a feminist who isn't opposed to porn.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-73715272531152751532007-11-27T09:39:00.000-08:002007-11-27T09:39:00.000-08:00Hey MattMan!!!Don't worry -- your insights have be...Hey MattMan!!!<BR/><BR/>Don't worry -- your insights have been quite interesting and relevant. And I'm already on that beat, as you can see from my blog. ;^)C. L. Hansonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12698855413639518095noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-18406010306427395142007-11-27T09:35:00.000-08:002007-11-27T09:35:00.000-08:00I'll just post one more thing, then shut up becaus...I'll just post one more thing, then shut up because my comments may come across to some that I'm a traditional gender role guy in disguise, which couldn't be further from the truth.<BR/><BR/>I couldn't possibly make my point any more clear than my domestic violence / children's rights advocate, Tami, who, as a woman, "gets" me. Here's a recent blurb she wrote on the topic: <BR/><A HREF="http://tamikay23.multiply.com/journal/item/314/June_Domestic_Violence_Against_Men_Awareness_Month" REL="nofollow">http://tamikay23.multiply.com/journal/item/314/June_Domestic_Violence_Against_Men_Awareness_Month</A><BR/><BR/>And with that, I'll apologize for raining on the 'feminist' parade -- my own hangups with that word have little to nothing to do with this blog and the ideals of chanson. It would be great, though, to have someone like chanson behind this fight against the insidious usurpation of power of a great movement involving the long-awaited equalizing of women.MattManhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03074590319118987024noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-28300242032340800272007-11-26T13:24:00.000-08:002007-11-26T13:24:00.000-08:00Hey BetaCandy and chanson. I can buy both your ar...Hey BetaCandy and chanson. I can buy both your arguments regarding feminism, and I am certainly nowhere near those who push traditional general roles. I applaud any and all efforts to reclaim feminism from those who have hijacked much of it.<BR/><BR/>I am for empowerment, so long as it does not oppress or deal unjustly in the process. I think both that, and making assumptions, are what cause most of the problems.<BR/><BR/>I would never want to make light of actual abuse cases (and I agree with BetaCandy that understanding emotional abuse is a serious hurdle we're far from overcoming) of men hurting women. However, the current stereotype of abuse being some man bruising up a woman, is grossly unfair now, and the numbers are hovering around and dipping below 50%, so it's not really even equal anymore (probably even less so if more men actually reported it, but that's another discussion).<BR/><BR/>But the assumption is still made that battering means male on female. If a guy calls the police to report abuse, the most likely scenario to play out will be that *he* goes to jail, even if he's covered with scratches, bruises, even blood and there's not a shred of evidence of battery on the woman who did it to him. Maybe he was verbally or emotionally abusive -- maybe -- however, in my opinion, words never justify physical violence; so that would be a separate case. And that's just the physical abuse cases. Trying to report emotional abuse is even worse, as we all know.<BR/><BR/>So my point really was that it's a human problem with both victims and perpetrators on both sides of the gender line, and instead of making assumptions that lead to the injustices I've suffered and gave a hypothetical example of earlier, why can't we instead rely on evidence and evaluation without any preconceived notions based solely on gender. Preconceived gender notions hurt men just as much as they hurt women.<BR/><BR/>That being said, I completely disagree with the statement that being opposed to feminism means being in favor of traditional gender roles. I am opposed to feminism as I've encountered (and been hurt by) it merely on the grounds that in my situation, it has succumbed to exercising the same inequality it claims to oppose (only with the gender roles reversed). And I'm certainly opposed to traditional gender roles -- those are some of the most sexist, unenlightened ideals ever held, and I agree they're worse than the inequalities I've experienced.<BR/><BR/>If enough feminists work to reclaim the title then I will once again support it wholeheartedly as I have before (and continue to support the noble ideals, minus the reverse oppression that has crept in). Until then, I'll continue to cringe at the word, as would any victim at the sight of their batterer. I sure hope this is fixed in the near future because humanity does not deserve to continue making these huge pendulum swings back and forth between extremes rather than embracing humanity and rising above oppression. If that's what feminism is about, then I'm all for it.<BR/><BR/>To make things a little more clear, knowing what I know of you, chason, and what BetaCandy wrote in her comment, the feminism to which I'm opposed has nothing to do with what you write that you stand for. I just need some aversion therapy on that word, I suppose, and am caught up in my own assumptions about what feminism is about based on my own experiences with some of the worst it has to offer.MattManhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03074590319118987024noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-66977190254210356652007-11-23T01:00:00.000-08:002007-11-23T01:00:00.000-08:00Hey BetaCandy!!!That is an excellent point, and yo...Hey BetaCandy!!!<BR/><BR/>That is an excellent point, and you've stated far better than I did what I really wanted to say about the term feminism:<BR/><BR/>Women are more than half the population, so a movement that promotes the interests of women is naturally going to come up with a variety of different positions and ideas, including positions that seem to be opposite one another. Just because I disagree with some of the things said by some who claim the label feminist, there's no way I'm going to react by saying "Well I guess I'm not a feminist, then."<BR/><BR/>Being <I>opposed to feminism</I> essentially means being in favor of traditional gender roles and subjugation of women, which is a lot farther from my position than even most feminists that I have disagreements with. Most of my disputes with other feminists have been more a question of priorities, strategy, nuance on complex issues, etc. I think it's a lot more productive to work within the feminist movement than to denounce the feminist movement (and all it has accomplished) and take our chances on whatever else is out there...C. L. Hansonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12698855413639518095noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-29111993625308368712007-11-22T22:29:00.000-08:002007-11-22T22:29:00.000-08:00MattMan, I think you've misidentified the problem....MattMan, I think you've misidentified the problem. It's not that feminism is in denial that women can abuse men; it's that only a small minority of people in our culture actually get how emotional abuse works.<BR/><BR/>My father was a very sneaky emotional abuser - he never said words or left bruises you could take to a judge. He held us hostage with the implied threat that if we tried to leave, he'd sweet-talk a judge into custody of me and finally get around to that sexual relationship he'd been trying to manipulate me into since I was 9. <BR/><BR/>He was a Baptist minister, a pillar of the community. I still believe even most feminists not particularly educated on emotional abuse wouldn't have believed my mother and me. But neither would... well, virtually anyone who hasn't lived through it.<BR/><BR/>I'm not saying you're wrong, precisely. I just think our entire understanding of abuse is so newly formed that we can't blame feminism for not single-handedly sorting it all out. <BR/><BR/>So I do what I can. I talk about my personal story, and I run a website that critiques film and TV's portrayals of women, and on that site I often talk about the disturbing lack of female abusers on shows as well as the disturbing lack of female heroes. My grandmothers were both abusive, too, and also pillars of the community. <BR/><BR/>I do identify myself as a feminist because if we abandon the term and leave it in the hands of people who've got it all wrong, then "feminism" gets a bad name and the alternative we'll be offered is to retreat to the kitchen and let the menfolk take care of us, and the very idea of depending on a man in any way terrifies me to this day, for reasons I assume are now obvious. Much better to reclaim the term, keep sending out healthy messages and eventually weed out the nutcases.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-63580518475612501282007-11-20T11:47:00.000-08:002007-11-20T11:47:00.000-08:00Hey MattMan!!!Regarding your first point, interest...Hey MattMan!!!<BR/><BR/>Regarding your first point, interestingly enough <A HREF="http://gretachristina.typepad.com/greta_christinas_weblog/" REL="nofollow">Greta Christina</A> was just talking about how she likes <A HREF="http://blog.blowfish.com/culture/on-surfing-the-web-for-spanking-porn/485" REL="nofollow">spanking porn</A>. I think a lot of scenarios (such as facials) are more conceived to show as much as possible to the viewer than they are respresentative of what the viewer desires to do. It's true much of it can be demeaning, boring, repetitive, but I don't see that as a reason to reject sexually explicit subjects entirely.<BR/><BR/>I remember your posts about your relationship, and I'm sorry to hear they didn't take you seriously. I would hope feminists (and people in general) would realize that a woman can be the abusive partner. It's statistically less commmon, but that's not a reason to laugh it off. I can definitely relate to feeling put off by a lot of the things the word feminism seems to represent. I'd like to think the movement isn't beyond hope, though...<BR/><BR/>Hey Aerin!!!<BR/><BR/>You're right, these kind of questions of human behavior are extremely complex, and you're not going to get very far by looking for a simple answer. Still, if there were a positive correlation between porn consumption and rape, I would be interested in studying it to try to understand it. But the actual numbers seem to point to an inverse correlation, so as a feminist who is interested in decreasing rape, I'm working on analysing this (see my other two articles on porn and feminism, linked above).<BR/><BR/>Hey Alon!!!<BR/><BR/>Very true!!! It seems like one of the innovations of the Internet is the presence of erotic imagery around ordniary people -- not just airbrushed models and people with super-endowments. This counters some of the complaints about some of the negative/unrealistic messages in porn. Really, improving the offerings seems like as good a solution or better than complaining about the bad.C. L. Hansonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12698855413639518095noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-74088508082894244602007-11-19T23:57:00.000-08:002007-11-19T23:57:00.000-08:00The internet has made all sorts of porn that doesn...The internet has made all sorts of porn that doesn't get made in San Fernando Valley more available. Part of it is way more hardcore and violent. But another part of it is amateur porn, featuring couples who have sex in front of a webcam; that tends to be a lot more realistic than garden variety porn.Alon Levyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12195377309045184452noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-525964068255696512007-11-19T19:03:00.000-08:002007-11-19T19:03:00.000-08:00In my mind, part of the issue is that we don't kno...In my mind, part of the issue is that we don't know what causes rape. I understand that it's about power and violence. But I think that it is more complicated than that. If we had a real answer that understood rape, why it happens - how to prevent it (which as far as I know, we don't) it would be different. <BR/><BR/>Blaming porn makes it easier.<BR/><BR/>I agree that sexually explicit materials shouldn't be blamed for what is clearly a more complicated problem - that has to do with patriarchy, men, women, self-esteem, mental health, abuse, violence, etc.Aerinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11142518259771067132noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-58579816728830238392007-11-19T15:53:00.000-08:002007-11-19T15:53:00.000-08:00There was a great article on the porn/harmful topi...There was a great article on the porn/harmful topic a while back on alternet. It can be viewed <A HREF="http://www.alternet.org/sex/67144/" REL="nofollow">here</A>. It doesn't really offer any conclusions, just kind of lays out both sides of the argument. I don't totally agreed with all the points made, but some resonated with me and some didn't.<BR/><BR/>For example, the argument about violence and disrespecting women in the porn, how men get off by seeing women enjoy things that most "normal" women wouldn't -- that argument doesn't float at all for me. Ass slapping, anything that would hurt or demean (such as a facial or anything like that), I would have a hard time doing. It would simply go, well, limp. Maybe I'm not a typical male. I've heard that *some* women do actually like some of that. It would have to be proven for me, and the partner I happened to be with would probably have to beg me, several times, assuring me it was desired, and even then I'd still probably have trouble doing it (again, using hurtful or demeaning examples). And frankly, I'm having a hard time finding porn anymore that really appeals to me because I find much of it too demeaning. Why aren't there producers of more "normal" sex for porn? Surely I can't be the only one that would like to see some. But alas, I'm left trying to scrounge through 'amateur' or 'reality' porn that's often very mislabeled as well. sigh.<BR/><BR/>On the topic of feminism, this will make me unpopular, but in recent years, I've learned to cringe at the word feminism. Allow me to explain, though. I'm a victim of an abusive marriage that I only recently escaped from (not completely yet though). Under conditions that common sense would dictate that I would be a better custodial parent and not be screwed in the outcome of divorce proceedings, almost the opposite is the case. I'm clearly the victim, as are my children to an extent, yet because of the heavy feminist lobby that has swung the pendulum way too far in that direction, and because I haven't been beaten repeatedly to a bloody pulp, my ex gets custody (although I do get decent visitation and rights) and an overly unfair split of the community assets, which will be squandered instead of held dear for college educations like I will do with my portion.<BR/><BR/>Anyway, I digress. As a male victim of domestic violence, I was largely simply ignored or even laughed at. I've had a cop show up on my doorstep after I left the abusive situation to ask me questions, instead of the other way around. And trying to ask for help from DV agencies, *I* get questioned as to my motives, as if I'd make the shit up and be the abuser myself. WTF?!<BR/><BR/>I guess my point here is that labels are just that, labels. If I were you, I would not lose any sleep over not identifying with the label 'feminist' -- that word, in my opinion, has been hijacked in large part by a group of people who are often a disgrace to their gender and humanity as a whole. Why can't we just focus on *human* issues and be completely gender neutral? Why does that defy so many humans' common sense?<BR/><BR/>I firmly believe men and women should have equal rights, equal pay, equal opportunities. Gender should not factor in any of that. Are you an author writing a computer language book? Great! That pays $x. Shouldn't matter what gender you are.<BR/><BR/>Somebody abused you and your children? Fine, you are granted a divorce, an equal split (or even in your favor split) of community assets, and evaluation of parenting skills is done to determine primary custodial parent. Gender doesn't factor.<BR/><BR/>Same goes for sexual orientation, race, and every other thing that's used to discriminate (or reverse discriminate). What the hell is wrong with the world?<BR/><BR/>Ok, rant over. Sorry for dumping in your comment section. :) If by feminist you mean something similar to what I described above, in terms of gender neutrality/equality, then I'm all for that. Unfortunately, that's not so much what the word feminist has come to mean any more. IMO, of course. Before learning this lesson the hard, I would have strongly identified myself as a male feminist. Now, not so much. A new word/classification that's more, well, un-defiled, is needed.MattManhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03074590319118987024noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-87055821066913054352007-11-18T23:10:00.000-08:002007-11-18T23:10:00.000-08:00Hey Sam-I-am!!!I had not heard about the Internet ...Hey Sam-I-am!!!<BR/><BR/>I had not heard about the Internet facilitating the growth of eroticized violence, but it stands to reason that it would. The Internet is a way to get images anonymously, and all kinds of images that one would be ashamed or afraid to seek in person can be found at the touch of a button. However, this could easily be a case where people are seeking these images because they're aleady having such fantasies, not that the availability of such images created the desire for them.<BR/><BR/>On the other hand, I think you're right about eroticized violence increasing in mainstream television and movies (and probably also video games). That's the sort of thing I would be more worried about because these materials are broadcast to young people across the spectrum, and have a lot of potential to influence them. Allowing more in terms of portrayal of healthy sexuality could potentially counter the trend (along the lines of your example: I'm pretty sure that European television has more sex and less violence than American).<BR/><BR/>Hey BetaCandy:<BR/><BR/>You're right to point out the potential for women to be exploited because it is very real. To suggest that every woman who participates in porn enjoys it and feels liberated by it is as wrong as to suggest that they're all exploited and self-hating.<BR/><BR/>My hope is to throw off the simple view that "all porn is bad" -- not to replace it with an equally simplistic pendulum swing towards "all porn is good" -- but rather to allow for a more nuanced analysis of media portrayals of women, including erotic portrayals. Your analysis of GGW and its message is a perfectly reasonable one, and although GGW was the trigger for our earlier discussion, I don't claim to have an opinion on GGW in particular (I've never seen it).<BR/><BR/>Regarding the choice to have sex vs. not to have sex, you're right that we've talked about this before, and I think we're essentially in agreement. Liking sex and wanting to have sex when you want it naturally goes (in my mind) with the right not to have sex when you don't want it, which is probably one of the main reasons why rape decreases as porn availibility increases. However women seem to make a huge personal connection with one side of this coin or the other, and different choices represent liberation for different women. Since and people naturally project their own feelings on others, there's a danger of seeing the opposite camp as having chosen wrong, hence must be brainwashed, not liberated. So feminists unfortunately end up attacking <I>each other</I>. But I think the answer is to try to emphasize how sexual liberation requires that both answers -- yes and no -- be available as real choices.C. L. Hansonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12698855413639518095noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-17991440406970791082007-11-18T22:02:00.000-08:002007-11-18T22:02:00.000-08:00I think we talked about this once before :D, but:O...I think we talked about this once before :D, but:<BR/><BR/>One of the problems I encounter in talking about porn is the difference between how women and men perceive it. Example: I'm convinced the vast majority of men who watch Girls Gone Wild see it as a bunch of stupid girls getting manipulated into stuff they wouldn't ordinarily do, just for a hat. I'm convinced most of the men watching it - and certainly the creator, who is just hideous - are turned on by the feeling of power over women rather than by healthy sexual feelings. <BR/><BR/>What the women in the videos feel, however, might be a sense of liberation. So am I against GGW? Damn straight. Am I against the women in it, or do I look down on them? Nope.<BR/><BR/>Ironically, those of us on the other end of the spectrum - who've perhaps experienced sexual abuse or something and decided "sexual freedom" meant the freedom NOT to have sex unless we damn well felt like it - feel just as shamed and scorned by the majority of feminists, who are still trapped in heterocentric thinking. I know that's not precisely a porn argument - I'm just saying that it's all a symptom of feminism still being locked into the idea that a healthy heterosexual relationship is one marker of a woman's success. For the patriarchy, it's the mark of her laudable acceptance of male domination; for feminists, it's the mark she's overcome domination and gotten a man to treat her right.<BR/><BR/>Sexual freedom has GOT to get redefined as relative to the individual, not an independent value judgment.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-11709519553468535412007-11-18T18:27:00.000-08:002007-11-18T18:27:00.000-08:00Three disjointed comments:I've heard (don't know f...Three disjointed comments:<BR/><BR/>I've heard (don't know from personal experience) that the internet has helped facilitate the growth of the "eroticized violence" category of porn, which I find very unsettling.<BR/><BR/>But then I also find it problematic that the number of rape scenes in movies and television shows has gone up dramatically, while not being visually explicit. These scenes in general do approach rape as something to be condemned, but still, I'm unsettled by it. Do you suppose all the Law and Order SVU episodes serve to spread moral reprehension against rape? Or just to freak out women and parents? <BR/><BR/>And as is often the complaint among women, most of the porn I see (usually in a hotel room with my dh) is yucky. Unlike the soft porn we used to see on late-night TV in France, which was very female friendly.<BR/><BR/>Sam-I-amAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-37934540111781014032007-11-18T00:43:00.000-08:002007-11-18T00:43:00.000-08:00Hey Anonymous!!!I certainly do not hate Mormons!!!...Hey Anonymous!!!<BR/><BR/>I certainly do not hate Mormons!!!<BR/><BR/>In the case of this post, I'm just talking about my personal experience with what I was taught about sexuality growing up. To be honest, many women who are active believing Mormons aren't happy about some things they were taught about sex and gender by the church. And I'm also not claiming that Mormonism has a monopoly on the patriarchal anti-sex crap -- it's just that this is the religion where my personal experience comes from. And all I've stated here is that Mormons preach against porn, and that they sometimes do object lessons comparing a sexually experienced girl with a piece of chewed gum (among other things). Most Mormons will freely tell you that this is an accurate description of what the youth are (or were?) taught.<BR/><BR/>Nothing I've written here earns me the charge of "Mormon-bashing" as the link you've posted appears to suggest. It's particularly sad that you've chosen to link me to a hate-escalating thread about how Mormons should hate Mormon-haters, etc. ad infinitum. If you read some of the other posts here on my blog and at <A HREF="http://latterdaymainstreet.com/" REL="nofollow">Main Street Plaza</A>, you'll see that one of my goals is to try to foster constructive discussion between current and former Mormons. If you have a constructive comment about any point I've made on this post or any other, please feel free to post it, and we can talk about it! :D<BR/><BR/>Hey Sacred Slut!!!<BR/><BR/>I know how you feel about feeling at odds with "the feminist party line". But feminists believe a lot of different things, and as far as I'm concerned, this post represents the feminist position on this issue even if some people believe that the feminist position is exactly the opposite of what I've written. I'm not going to just lie down and cede to them the title "feminist." I say let's discuss it, and may the best ideas win!!! :DC. L. Hansonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12698855413639518095noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-19053670.post-34462842496662558542007-11-17T21:24:00.000-08:002007-11-17T21:24:00.000-08:00Good post and thanks for raising this issue. I get...Good post and thanks for raising this issue. I get pretty sick of much of the feminist party line, despite being, in my own mind at least, a feminist.<BR/><BR/>I love porn, which may not come as a surprise to my blog readers. Apparently I'm in the minority among women, or at least that's the story I hear. I like erotic pics, erotic fiction, movies, whatever.<BR/><BR/>What I don't like is men treating women disrespectfully (or vice versa, but that may be another story). I'm not sure that has anything to do with porn. <BR/><BR/>I have seen some really disgusting and degrading porn online. But I think this has more to do with modern American culture and the general atmosphere of disrespect and disdain for all people than it does specifically to degrading women relative to sex.<BR/><BR/>In my ideal world, men and women would both have a healthy interest in sex, a strong sexuality, and respect and reverence for each other and their bodies as a result. The respect/reverence probably has more to do with raising our children as humanists than anything else.<BR/><BR/>That's my theory anyhow.Reason's Whorehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09386477323714963087noreply@blogger.com