At Sacrament Meeting, I wondered if perhaps I shouldn't take the sacrament. It had been three days since the incident with Walter, and I hadn't even started repenting yet. I knew that you weren't supposed to take the sacrament if you had some big sin on your conscience that you hadn't repented of.
On the other hand, I figured that if I didn't take it, my parents would notice and they would ask me what was up. That was a question I really didn't want to deal with. In the end I figured that my big sin plus unworthily taking the sacrament didn't really amount to all that much more than the big sin alone without unworthily taking the sacrament, so I just took the sacrament as usual.
I wondered if Walter was having the same dilemma in his own ward at church. Of course he was probably clever enough to have already started repenting by this point, so he probably didn't have to worry about it. Read the rest of the story ->
8 comments:
I there... you really showed what happens in the Mormon culture and pregnancy. There were two girls (sisters) in one of our wards who got pregnant at 15. Their parents sent them away to have the babies and to give them up for adoption.
Ever after these two girls were considered tainted. No one ever knew who the father's were... but I think they were probably the same age.
Hey Cynthia!!!
Yeah, it's unfortunate, but these sorts of things happen.
To second Cynthia's comment - In these past few chapters - I thought it was important to show that teenage LDS women are really put in a bind.
On the one hand, they need to be attractive and attempt to draw boys' attention (because marriage is so vital and teenaged mo women are very aware of that). Many are only a handful of years away from marriage themselves - marrying at 18, 19 or 20. Unmarried women in LDS culture at 23 or 24 are considered "old maids". In other parts of mainstream American culture, that's not the case at all.
On the other hand, teenage LDS young women are responsible for keeping everything in check. They can't dress too provactively (sp). They can't "go too far" - and they are blamed if they do. I have heard people suggest (sadly) that some women put themselves in that situation - they were alone with whomever it was and so it was their fault. It's a shame.
It's an impossible situation to be in.
I agree with aerin. Also, there was this morality tale of a chaste Mormon woman who wore a dress about three inches above her knee. She was raped. The priesthood talked about her immoral behavior causing the rape. It was horrible.
It was discussed (I was disgusted) that the man couldn't help his behavior. Talk about blaming the victim.
Given how autobiographical these stories are, this one showed a lot of courage to write and share.
I can't speak for chanson - but I'm not sure just how autobiographical some of the stories are.
For example, later in the novel there is a character who escapes from a polygamous family - one uncle is a polygamist and the other is not. I don't think she and I have any family members who are practicing polygamists/fundamentalist LDS in Southern Utah. (She and I are first cousins).
And for men who depend on the strength of women to stay in line. For me at least, I had this vision of women as somehow perfect, strong and with out fault. What a shock it was for me when I found out that women were human just like men are.
The L.D.S. Gender roles are not fair to either sex.
Thanks for the provocative story Chanson.
Wayne
Hey Aerin -- exactly!!!
Thanks Stephen!!!
The particulars of this segment are fictional. However it is autobiographical in the sense that I carefully re-read my journals from when I was fourteen, fifteen, and sixteen years old, and then wrote it in that voice and with the attitudes I remembered having. The events are based on my fears at that age, mixed with real stories from other girls.
Thanks Wayne!!!
It's true there's an expectation that the girl is in charge of drawing the line...
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