Monday, June 21, 2010

“These beautifully flawed vessels”: The Conclusion of ExMormon!

I love to joke around. I've got the perfect joke for just this occasion. It's an oldie, so stop Me if you've heard it:

Way back when Jesus and I were creating the world, I turned to Him and said "Hey Jesus, let's create a really gorgeous mountainous region, with lakes and rivers full of fish, beautiful canyons, waterfalls, valleys, and peaks..."

Then Jesus said "But Dad, that'll never fly! Everyone will want to live there, and it will get so crowded, it will suck!"

Then I said "I'm one step ahead of You Jesus, My boy! Why do You think I created Mormons?"


I'm just kidding, of course! The Mormons are My chosen people these days, so that's why I love having a little fun with them!

Now this whole idea of leaving the only true church is so completely nuts that I couldn't help but be fascinated when I noticed that some of My children were organizing a whole conference just for people whom I was planning on sending to outer darkness. Being omniscient and all, of course I knew it was going to happen. But that didn't make it any less entertaining to watch! More ->


Karen said...

I enjoy the way you personify God, Jesus, and Mary in this segment. Do Mormons really think of them this way? As such human personalities?

Also, I'm glad to see that Spencer and Tanya finally get a chance together.

C. L. Hanson said...

Thanks Karen!!!

The thing is that -- according to traditional Mormon theology -- God the Father was once a person Himself on a planet like us. So, yes, it makes sense to portray them with human personalities in a Mormon context.

I've taken a couple of liberties, though. First of all, according to the Mormon temple ceremony, the faithful must avoid "loud laughter." So I'm fudging a bit to suggest that the Mormon God loves jokes. Plus, the idea that Mary (the mother of Jesus) is one of God's wives -- some Mormons believe that, but some don't.

C. L. Hanson said...

p.s. When clicking on your link, my browser gives me a "possible phishing site" warning -- do you know anything about that?

Karen said...

I clicked on it and got a similar message. I'll speak to my ISP (which just happens to be run by my nephew) about it. Thanks.

Karen said...

RE: browser warning when clicking on link: I think Blogger screwed up. I didn't submit my web page link, only my email address, and blogger turned it into a page link. Please ignore.