Saturday, February 23, 2008

Googl-oetry (search query poetry)

Through the magic of the Internet, the technique of making collages out of "found objects" can now be applied to poetry!!! The Exterminator followed by Ordinary Girl have created some astonishing poetry out of search queries that have led people to their blogs. Poetry is not my strong point, so this meme is a bit of a challenge for me, but it looked like so much fun that I had to try it!!!

Since my blog is currently going through the constellation of sexuality, my poem today is a comic-erotic poem. I was hoping to make a limerick, but the medium of search queries has its limitations... ;^)

Every line below is a (completely unedited) search query that led someone to my blog with the past few days!!!

looking for sexiest blog

nude beaches
topless beaches
unsuspecting photos of topless beach goers
moms at the beach topless here's some pics
is it wrong for my 5 year old to go topless
can you go topless in egypt

france male nude beaches
handsome men in kilts
photos of naked male bodyworker
men in kilts with no underwear

whale sex parts
picture of whales mating
studies about sex on the first date
is it ok to have sex on the first date

funny naked people
comic nudity
tucson topless sunbathing
nude beaches in nj pics
topless sunbathing in slovakia
topless beaches in new jersey
functioning democracy new jersey

sexually aroused look in his eye
men just can't help leering
people naked in the shower
topless/nude older women
promiscuous women
france public sex
sex mit der ex
masturbating public sex stories
why does porn lead to masterbation

mormon girls
byu chicks
naughty mormon girls
sex at byu
my first sexual experiences
post mormons
cultural mormonism
mormon sexuality
mormons virginity
any scrapbooking companies not owned by mormans?

an atheist's story
erotic atheists
intimate spirituality
atheist waiting until marriage to have sex
it takes a lot of faith to be an athiest
believe in love. believe in magic. hell, believe in santa cl


The Exterminator said...

You've just gotta wonder: Who types in these search terms?

Anonymous said...

That's a great poem. Well done. I don't have to search for male nude beaches anymore because I can find them right here. :)


Moi’s officially ignored film/research
into the origin of Christendom.

Since the film is
the awful facts it must be disregarded by those that tout
the beautiful untruths.

The Religious Authorities, and those that GAIN from there being religions [e.g., People in the “Business” of Atheism] always say NOT to view that which they DO want you to see and avert their eyes, and remain quite silent, about that which they hope you will not chance upon.

Part I

Part II

Stay on groovin’ safari,

C. L. Hanson said...

Hey Exterminator!!!

True it's a mystery, but I'm not complaining. Even people who come in on the randomest queries (such as for Vegemite or Lourdes or obviously looking for dirty stuff) and then stick around and read a bunch of other posts on various subjects. Additionally, sometimes people come in on queries that are misspelled and seem sub-literate yet still stick around to read multiple posts. Then I'm happy because the Internet can improve both literacy and critical thinking skills (see Think for yourself). I hope my posts are amusing enough to entice them away from the T.V. and towards the world of two-way communication.

Thanks Chaplain!!!

Actually, I don't think I've actually written about male nude beaches, but people come here looking for them... ;^)

Hey Tor!!!

I don't mind people plugging their own work here, but can we try to keep the comments at least somewhat relevant to this blog? Thanks.

Maddie said...

I love this!

Anonymous said...

Hmmm... "erotic atheists."

Did I tell you I have a great idea for a site? You want in?

C. L. Hanson said...

Thanks Melliferous Pants!!!

I'm glad the Exterminator came up with this -- it's so much fun!!!

Hey Kelly!!!

Sounds like fun -- absolutely!!! :D

Aerin said...

Have you mentioned this before - how you can find your google stats/hits? Is it something you have in the code on your page? Or a setting within the blog?

Anonymous said...

Great poem!!

any scrapbooking companies not owned by mormans?

LMAO!! That is the funniest single line.

C. L. Hanson said...

Hey Aerin!!!

I don't think there's a built-in service on blogspot. I use statcounter. I should plug them because I love their service. It's easy -- just go there and make an account, then they give you a little script to paste into your blog template. Then you can see all your stats, incoming search queries, etc.

Hey Wry!!!

I love that one too!!! This is one of the most entertaining points about blogging -- the hilarious incoming search queries!!! For example, you wouldn't believe how many people hit my blog with queries like "what to wear to the nude beach?" But as I explained here, I'm laughing with people, not at them. Well, mostly. ;^)

Anonymous said...

Handsome men in kilts? Must be having withdrawals from the Renaissance Festival. LOL

C. L. Hanson said...

Hey MXRacer632!!!

No, it's because I really did post pictures of handsome men in kilts.

UneFemmePlusCourageuse said...

How, exactly, do you check to find search queries that led people to your blog?

C. L. Hanson said...

Hey UFPC!!!

You have to sign up for a service. See my response to Aerin above. :D