My Utopian Idea!

Ever since I was a kid, I've contemplated how human society could function differently, for the better. I've come up with a lot of naive ideas over the years (I'll bet Mathmom remembers what we came up with back in High School) -- which is fine because figuring out why a given solution wouldn't work helps you to hone in on a good solution. I assume many of the rest of you have spent time on the same problem, especially if you like science fiction. I've never liked being limited to the capitalist/communist dichotomy, as though no new possibilities or ideas have flowered over the past half-century -- despite how dramatically things have changed in that amount of time.

I'd like to ask you to pause a few moments (step away from the computer, if necessary) and think about ideas you've had about how society might be different. When you're done, please come back and read my new idea.

Done?

OK, here's mine:

All adults get one half-day of education per week for their entire lives.

Here's how it works: Each person takes one course per semester (six months), and the course can be anything at all that could potentially be offered by a university or a community college or even a vocational school. This would include subjects like art, music, and sports (even extreme sports) in addition to standard academic courses. The only restriction would be that you can't take more than three semesters in a row in the same broad subject area (eg. once you take three semesters of sports or three semesters of science, then the next semester you have to study something else). Anyone who employs anyone else would be aware that every employee requires one half-day of release time per week (in the same way that they are now aware that employees must be documented and have social security tax paid on them, etc.).

This came to me while contemplating the current U.S. health insurance reform debates. I think that a good government needs to be "of the people, by the people, for the people" (because rulers and oligarchs tend to see their needs/interests as outweighing others' needs, even when they sincerely believe they're being fair), and a functioning democracy or republic depends on an educated populace.

Education is one of the farthest things from a "zero sum game" there is. If one person gets a lot of it, that takes nothing from the big pot of education that's left for others. If anything, it increases the big pot, because if your friend learns something, she might find it interesting enough to tell you about it, and then you might learn something to and/or feel motivated to learn more on your own.

I'm discouraged to see the trend in the U.S. of viewing education as "every man for himself" and as long as your own kids get some, then screw everybody else. You (and your kids) have to live in the same society with everybody else's kids. (As an aside, I often wonder how much good could be done if all those people who home-school would instead send their kids to public school and then invest that same amount of time that they now spend home-schooling on improving the public school instead.)

In addition to the benefit from the education itself, my plan would have further advantages:

1. Linking the campuses would be a boon to developing viable public transportation. One of the problems with setting up a public transportation grid is that you need to have common destinations (as opposed to having all of the start and end points diffused over a large area). With this system, you just go to whichever campus is nearest to your home or work, and from there take a train to whichever campus offers your class. (Naturally the class itself would be less than half a day, to allow time for transportation.)

2. People would constantly be meeting people outside of their socio-economic-racial-cultural group (and making friends, since they'd be meeting people with common interests), which would diminish racism and classism, helping society to function more harmoniously.

3. The society would be more responsive to changing labor needs. If a given line of work starts becoming obsolete and some other skill is desperately needed, then the change in demand could be swiftly met by a change in the labor supply.

Naturally the biggest drawback to this plan is that the United States of America cannot afford to do this. And that's not to even begin with the political reality (that apparently a big portion of the American public would rather continue to be royally ripped off by the world's most expensive healthcare-payment-bureaucracy -- as long as that bureaucracy will reassure them that nobody will get something for nothing). Unlike health insurance reform, universal socialized adult education would cost a lot more money than it saves. And I'm sure I don't have to review for you what state the U.S. economy and treasury are in.

I'm just saying, if it were possible, what a wonderful world this would be!

Now, you've probably noticed that my plan says nothing about economics or about how to deal with the energy crisis. I have more about energy coming up (from a book I'm currently reading), and as for economics, well, as I said here, I should have taken more courses in economic theory. (Maybe I could, if only my utopian fantasy were a reality!) In other words, I'm open to suggestions.

Obscure Requests via Google!

Along the same lines as the puzzling queries from June, my latest queriers have been looking for some rather strange and obscure information. Some of these odd requests are actually relevant to stuff I've written about! Others, not so much.

But -- in my endless quest to provide a valuable, blogtastic public service -- I will answer them here for you!! As usual (see here, here, here, here, here, and here) all are real, unedited search queries that people typed in to land on my blog.

Q: what are the chances of me living in a parallel universe
A: Parallel to what? Parallel to the "real" universe? Or to something else?

I suppose that if parallel universes exist, then the universe you're in may be parallel to one of them, hence your universe would be parallel to it. (I'm not speaking for my own universe though.) Also, don't rule out living in a perpendicular universe!

Q: whale mating porn video
A: See, this is kind of an obscure one, and yet I've written about it twice, here and here. Since those two posts, I've actually seen another David Attenborough film that featured an extended group-whale-sex scene with multiple male whales simultaneously attempting to mate with a female. I'm sorry I don't remember the name of the film. Also -- for future reference -- when the mating scene involves only non-human animals, it's not called a "porn video," it's called a "nature documentary."

Q: why grammar rules??
A: They give the pedantic something to do.

Q: lds stories of overcoming challenges in are lives
A: Challenges like... homonym impairment? (I know, that's too easy and kinda conflicts with my previous answer, but I'm going to go with it.)

Q: abigail van buren teen nudity
A: Now that's obscurity for you! I don't recall having reviewed Erotic Stories from the Lives of the First Ladies.

At least that's what I was thinking until it hit me that Martin Van Buren's wife was actually named "Hannah" and "Abigail Van Buren" is the advice columnist "Dear Abby." It's very possible that Dear Abby has written about teen nudity -- I wouldn't know since I haven't read her column since I was a teen myself. But don't write to her, write to me! Via Google!

Q: essay on picnic in swimming pool
A: It is not a good idea to have a picnic in a swimming pool because it gets the food all wet and chlorine-y, not to mention yuckifying the pool water. The End.

Q: does south pole exists
A: Well, there's not really a candy-striped pole (like they have near Santa's at the North Pole), but there is indeed a point where the Earth's rotational axis intersects the surface of Antarctica.

Q: don't want to go on mission lds
A: I'm totally with you on this one. As much as I hated the sexism of the LDS church as a teen, this was one point where I really appreciated the sexism. Even at my most faithful, I couldn't understand why any woman would choose to go on a mission since they're not obligated to do it. To me, it was like God said He'd appreciate it if you'd show your faithfulness by poking your eye out with a fork, but He wouldn't be disappointed if you choose not to do it. I was like, "OK, I won't then." But that's just me.

Q: are you allowed on a lds mission if you have had sex
A: It depends. If you're going on one of those "retired couple" missions, you're actually allowed to have sex while on your mission! It seems a shame, really, since the young ones are more likely to appreciate the privilege.

However, I assume you're talking about those young, clean-cut guys in their Mr. Mac suits -- can they really all be virgins??? You can get in trouble just thinking about it!

Since they changed the rules a few years ago ("raising the bar"), I think that having had sex (even after repentance) may disqualify a young person from serving a mission, but it probably depends on the local leaders and on how convincingly penitent the prospective missionary is. Also I hear that some lie about this in order to be allowed to go. Mystifying but true!

Q: mormon erotic stories
A: Please see the Gratuitious Love Scene, or -- if you prefer gay missionary stories -- see Missions, Mothers, & Marriage.

Q: my wife is naked
A: Then what the hell are you doing wasting your time on the Internet?

*** Actually this is kind of leading towards the non-obscure, most popular search query topic! ***

Q: i dont mind my sis nude in beach
A: That's very noble of you.

Q: how to get your girlfriend topless on beach
Q: wife wants to tan topless
Q: wife won't go topless
Q: wife topless beach
Q: let wife go nude on beach ?
Q: i encourage my wife to sunbathe topless
A: This seems to be an extremely common conundrum! Some men want their wives/girlfriends to sunbathe nude or topless, others can't decide whether they want that or not. It's just too bad that I don't seem to attract nearly as many queries from women about whether/why they'd like to sunbathe topless -- we could have a summit on the subject! I suspect women don't spend nearly as much time thinking about it, though...

I know, I know, I'm just assuming that the above are queries from men, when some of them might be from lesbians. I still think that it's a safe bet that most of them are from men. The only nude beach query I've gotten lately that I'd bet is from a woman is this one:

Q: is portsmouth nude beach full of old men
A: I have no idea. Why not check it out and report back? :D

Sunstone exmo party and other fun in SLC!!

I hadn't been to Utah in seven years -- my last visit was long before I took up discussing Mormonism on the Internet -- so I was curious to have a look at this so-called "Main Street Plaza" I'd heard so much about.

(The group blog Main Street Plaza is actually named after the pedestrian passage separating Temple Square from the Church Office Building -- once a public road, it is now owned by the CoJCoL-dS, which prohibits gay people from kissing there.)

I had some fun touring the LDS sites with my brother. There's some interesting stuff in the Church History Museum, including the original golden Moroni statue and this Masonic-seeing-eye beehive quilt:



The Salt Lake Temple is a lot smaller than it looks in pictures (where they like to get close and point the camera up at it), and it doesn't help that they've surrounded it with other large and tall buildings.

Other surprises? Well, I saw a couple of Smarts, which I didn't expect:


I also saw an "erotic bakery" -- which I'd thought was just a joke that was made up for "The Simpsons". I would have gone to get a closer look and a picture, but it was on the other side of the road, and I'd gotten tired of crossing these crazy downtown streets that are eight lanes wide on every single block. (All of the main sites are within a few blocks of one another, but that doesn't mean they're anywhere near each other...)

Then I went to a fabulous party with some of the coolest folks in town:


I'd like to call it an Outer Blogness party, but some of these exmos' blogs aren't on the list yet. (Please leave a comment if you have the URL of any former/cultural Mormon blog that isn't on the "Outer Blogness" list yet.)



This picture illustrates why I sadly missed some of the Sunstone Symposium on Wednesday morning (including the Zelophehad's daughters panel and Margaret Toscano's presentation about God's genitals). I was really embarrassed, thinking, "Great, here I am giving a panel on overcoming stereotypes, and I miss the beginning of the conference because of a party-related headache..."

But that's not a stereotype or misconception -- it's totally accurate! When the exmo atheists come into town, partying is the first order of business. ;^)